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Category Archives: Humanist ceremony

Garden Sculpture, Birthday Lunch and Carol Singing

1  The hare in our garden looked suitably unimpressed with the frosty start to this morning.

Garden Sculpture

Garden Sculpture

2  Enjoying a Birthday lunch with a good friend we noticed a horse-drawn wedding carriage draw up at the beach.

Horse-drawn Wedding carriage

Horse-drawn Wedding carriage

On the trailer ready to be taken home

3   People from all of Claire’s choirs turned up to sing at the Christmas Parade in Redruth tonight. We sang after the parade as the children queued to see Father Christmas, who, I was very pleased to see, was wearing a green outfit which was what he wore in Tudor and Victorian times before Clement Clarke Moore (1779 – 1863) wrote ‘Twas the night before Christmas!

 

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Beach Wedding, Sweet Pea Posy and Potatoes

1   The Wedding was absolutely beautiful! The sun shone, the couple were radiant and the tide stayed out! After the very moving Ceremony, I managed to snatch a couple of photos.

The newly married couple

Called for the formal photos

Dress from behind

These lovely words were read by the Groom’s Mum. It is called ‘Beauty of Love’

The question is asked: ‘Is there anything more beautiful in life than a young couple clasping hands and pure hearts in the path of marriage? Can there be anything more beautiful than young love?’ And the answer is given: ‘Yes, there is a more beautiful thing. It is the spectacle of an old man and an old woman finishing their journey together on that path. Their hands are gnarled but still clasped; their faces are seamed but still radiant; their hearts are physically bowed and tired but still strong with love and devotion. Yes, there is a more beautiful thing than young love. Old love.

2   Last night I was given this highly scented and very pretty posy of sweet peas. Thank you, Brenda! (and also for the pheasant which we will so enjoy on our return from babysitting in London.)

Present of a Posy

3   This afternoon has been spent in the beautifully sunny garden doing tidying up Autumny jobs – another picking of beans and the container grown Christmas Day potatoes needed earthing up.

Christmas potatoes ready for earthing up

 

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Wedding Rehearsal, Cornish Ice-cream and Email

1    The rehearsal for tomorrow’s Wedding Ceremony went off really well. We are planning for it to be on the beach even if it rains! We did the run-through indoors today as the tide was too far up!

The beautiful beach where the Wedding will take place.

2    There was a Kelly’s Ice-cream van on the cliffs when I went back to check out access to the beach later. I can never resist one of their ice-creams, one of the best in Cornwall!

Kelly’s Cornish ice-cream

3   Since meeting the poet, John Siddique, a few years ago at a local Readers’ Day, I’ve been getting his newsletter so I though I’d tell him about yesterday’s post. He wrote back a lovely email today, thanking me.

 

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Syncopation, Baby Naming and ‘Making it up”

1    A brilliant singing session where we had to work really hard with some tricky notes and syncopation and then a lovely coffee session with friends in the cafe downstairs.

2    Spent a happy hour with L, Choir-baby T’s Mum, planning  his Humanist Baby Naming. He slept throughout and woke just as we finished.

Choir-baby T

3    The following poem by John Siddique, a particular favourite of mine which I give to parents of new babies, is probably going to be included.

MAKING IT UP

Fold yourself the mind you want.

Make a paper hat

and wear it on your head. Hold it tight

when the wind blows.

Paint yourself the heart you desire. Pin it

on your jumper, be proud of your colours.

Pin it fast and don’t mind the rain.

Write yourself the love you love. Hold that

paper tight in your hand. Unfold it often,

read your plan aloud in sun and in snow.

Walk yourself the world you want. Each step

is breath. It’s your life. Stamp big-footed.

Walk soft. Dance your way in all the weathers.

John Siddique

NB  I posted this yesterday, 27th September, and had some likes and comments but it has since disappeared and shows now only as a draft with no tags/ categories so I’m publishing it again. Just found that it has already been published twice on my Facebook page – all very odd!

 

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Together, Rain Resilient Flowers and Wedding Words

1   A beautiful quiet day at home together, catching up with ourselves after a hectic few weeks!

2   A look around the garden shows some flowers which have just about managed to survive the stormy rain that fell while we were away.

Calianthus Gladiolus

Gladiolus

Japanese Anenome

3   I’ve printed out the Wedding Ceremony that I’m conducting on Saturday. The whole ceremony, to be held on the beach if the weather allows, is going to be so beautiful.

 

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White Glow, Winter Coat and “You can shed tears..”

1   I love the white flowers in our garden at this time of year as the sunlight is lower and they gain a kind of glow which is very beautiful.

White Borage, Blue Sky

Cosmos

Sweet Pea

Dahlia

Viburnum

2   The nights are becoming noticeably colder and one of ‘our’ beautiful horses has been given his winter coat already.

Horses in the evening sunlight

3   This very beautiful poem by David Harkins, poet and painter, was read at Monday’s funeral for a very special lady. We both found the words very touching.

“You can shed tears that she is gone,
or you can smile because she has lived.
You can close your eyes and pray that she’ll come back,
or you can open your eyes and see all she’s left.
Your heart can be empty because you can’t see her,
or you can be full of the love you shared.
You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday,
or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday.
You can remember her only that she is gone,
or you can cherish her memory and let it live on.
You can cry and close your mind,
be empty and turn your back.
Or you can do what she’d want:
smile, open your eyes, love and go on.”

It’s a poem I shall be putting into my ‘When I’ve gone’ drawer.

 

Just a little extra – Linda identified yesterday’s flower for me. Thank you so much. Fascinating info to be found here   http://www.strangewonderfulthings.com/181.htm

 

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Suffragette Garden, Mobile Library and Thomas Hardy

1   We spent a pleasing hour or two choosing beautiful plants for my Suffragette Garden, a small plot in the front which we have just finished clearing. Everything growing in this space will be purple, white or green to honour my Great Granny who was a Suffragette. She was imprisoned in Holloway for her ‘misdeeds’ while fighting for the right for women to vote and we are very proud of her. I have had a Suffragette Garden wherever I have lived.

2   Driving home, we saw a Mobile Library van, stuffed with books and with such a pleasing slogan on the back, “The universe at your fingertips!”

The Mobile Library van travelling around Cornwall

3   The following poem by Thomas Hardy was read this morning at a Humanist Funeral we went to. It was a beautiful and very moving ceremony to celebrate the life, and to mark the untimely death, of the son of friends of ours. The same poem was chosen by my parents for their funerals so it has a particular place in my heart.

Afterwards by Thomas Hardy

When the Present has latched its postern behind my tremulous stay,
And the May month flaps its glad green leaves like wings,
Delicate-filmed as new-spun silk, will the neighbours say,
‘He was a man who used to notice such things’?

If it be in the dusk when, like an eyelid’s soundless blink,
The dewfall-hawk comes crossing the shades to alight
Upon the wind-warped upland thorn, a gazer may think,
‘To him this must have been a familiar sight.’

If I pass during some nocturnal blackness, mothy and warm,
When the hedgehog travels furtively over the lawn,
One may say, ‘He strove that such innocent creatures should come to no harm,
But he could do little for them; and now he is gone.’

If, when hearing that I have been stilled at last, they stand at the door,
Watching the full-starred heavens that winter sees
Will this thought rise on those who will meet my face no more,
‘He was one who had an eye for such mysteries’?

And will any say when my bell of quittance is heard in the gloom
And a crossing breeze cuts a pause in its outrollings,
Till they rise again, as they were a new bell’s boom,
‘He hears it not now, but used to notice such things’

4      Just want to add – thinking of friends in the path of Isaac and hoping for everyone’s safety.
 

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Arizona Boots, A Baby Naming and My Cat Likes to Hide in Boxes

1.   My lovely sister had these boots made for me by an artist in Prescott, Arizona after I had so admired hers. I always wear them for Baby Naming Ceremonies.

Boots for Baby Namings

2.  Two days of downpour prevented today’s Baby Naming Ceremony from being in the garden but it all went off very well in the Village Hall. H was delightful and did listen when I spoke directly to him – “We have come together here today to formally introduce you, H, to our world. Please treat it gently, with respect and with a curious mind.”

With my lovely Baby Naming Family

3.  I was reminded today of a beautiful picture book for children which we must read to Jake. Go to Sam and Holly‘s blog  for a review of ‘Rosie’s Walk’.   I don’t seem to have the copy we had for our four but came across this old favourite in the collection that I have kept for the next generation. We all loved the rhyme and the fun and had a couple of cats who loved to hide in boxes!

An old favourite

 

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Curiosity, A Stream and A Peacock

1   Curiosity landed on Mars! Isn’t that just a lovely thing to hear? I love that name!

2   I parked near a stream this morning when I went to meet my Baby Naming family. It was so lovely. The sound of the water was beautiful, the reeds lovely and the whole experience very peaceful and I loved it. I just wish I could give you the sound as well as a photo.

The stream in St Erth

3   Driving home from a fabulous choir session tonight (where my part was changed to my initial consternation but in fact it is a beautiful part that suits my voice even better! Thank you Claire and I’m sorry I was grumpy!) I came across this peacock in a garden!  I stopped to take a picture but was somewhat hurried so unfortunately it’s a bit blurred but how often does that happen?!

Peacock in someone’s drive!

 

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Hitching a Ride, White Dahlia, Baby Naming and No 4

1      I was stopped for a while behind a van this morning and noticed three snails hitching a ride on the back doors!

Snails on the back of a van – look closely!

2  This dahlia was broken by the wind so we have brought it in. Isn’t it just beautiful in the almost invisible vase?

White dahlia

3   I’ve been working on a Baby Naming Ceremony this afternoon and the following is one of the readings the parents have chosen. It’s more words that I usually give you but it’s worth reading.  I would add just one line – ‘Look every day for the beauty that is all around you.’  I’ve put my favourite lines in italics.

Everybody’s Free  (to wear sunscreen) Mary Schmich  Chicago Tribune

Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of ’97… wear sunscreen.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be IT.

The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience.

I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded. But trust me, in 20 years you’ll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked.

You are NOT as fat as you imagine.

Don’t worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you.

Sing.

Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts, don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don’t waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind. The race is long, and in the end, it’s only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive, forget the insults; if you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch.

Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn’t know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don’t.

Get plenty of calcium.

Be kind to your knees, you’ll miss them when they’re gone.

Maybe you’ll marry, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll have children, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll divorce at 40, maybe you’ll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don’t congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself, either. Your choices are half chance, so are everybody else’s. Enjoy your body, use it every way you can. Don’t be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever own.

Dance. Even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room.

Read the directions, even if you don’t follow them.

Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents, you never know when they’ll be gone for good.

Be nice to your siblings; they are your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography, in lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard; live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.

Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths, prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too will get old, and when you do you’ll fantasize that when you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don’t expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you’ll have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one might run out.

Don’t mess too much with your hair, or by the time you’re 40, it will look 85. Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it’s worth. But trust me on the sunscreen.

Everybody’s Free  for the Baz Luhrmann version.

4    Especially for  ChocChip Uru who loved the poppy seed head yesterday – a side view, a flower and a bee.

Poppy, seed-head and bee

 

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